Surgery & Results

Hey everyone,

Hang in there with me, this post is all over the place.....

Sorry for the late response on surgery i haven't really felt like lashing it all out, I'm finally starting to feel myself again. About time i tell ya! Anyways, so lets start with the surgery. I went in for the surgery on the 8th. Got there early after only prob 2 hours of sleep. My husband and dad went with me. They called me back, gave me an EKG then left me sitting there worrying for about 1/2 hr. Then out of no where people started coming in all of the sudden. LOL The nurse that came in to take my history and explain about my surgery was AWESOME! She was pleasant, explaining everything. Then the nurse came in for the IV, which scares me to death. I HATE IV's or i did, until this time. Now I'm not so afraid of them. Anyways so the RN kept me distracted while the nurse worked on the IV. Apparently they have a numbing gel or something, so i barely noticed she was working on the Iv, next thing i knew it was done! YAY. So anyways anesthesia came in to answer questions, and i asked some since i googled some horror stories about it. But they assured me it will be fine, i wont feel anything. & They will give me a relaxant into my IV before. So then after i was mostly hooked up, they let my dad and husband come back in to check on me before i went back. By then, i was pretty calm about it all. (Before the Versed relaxer i might add, everyone made me feel at ease). So then i was being rolled back into the Operating room, and man i tell ya it feels creepy looking around that room. They had already gave me one dose of the Versed before we headed that way and i didn't feel ANYTHING from it, so they gave me another dose. Then gave what they said was just oxygen, which i actually think was anesthesia. Cause that's the last i remember.....

Waking up from anesthesia was weird, it was just like waking up from a very deep sleep. Felt like i was at home, and the husband was annoying me to wake up. Except for the horrible burning need to pee, which i was told was from the catheter. They wouldn't let me up, i was not happy. It wasn't fun. But it went away a few minutes later. Anyways, snapped outta the grogginess pretty quickly, i have a pretty high tolerance i guess. No nausea, just felt like i lost some time. Then i was moved to recovery where my dad and Chris were waiting. They gave me some apple juice. My throat was bothering me, due to the tube. That was my only complaint at the moment. They had me on morphine for the pain at that time. Then they said i was ready to go and gave me pain meds, which i was pretty annoyed with because i cant take what they gave me. At this point i was starting to feel the pain, morphine was wearing off. I knew plain Vicodin wasn't going to help, and plain vicodin makes me sick also. So of course the nurse then (diff one) was a BITCH. Said they wont do anything stronger, i was very moody, at this point i had found out what they have found which i thought was NOTHING and i went through all that for nothing. So i was ready to scream, cry. Which i think was from the anesthesia cause that only lasted a day. So anyways to get out of there i asked the nurse for Norco which is similar to vicodin but has less Tylenol and i can tolerate it better. They argued it was the same thing, and i was just getting aggravated. I informed them that in 05 i was on multiple different pain meds after an auto accident so i am aware of how things react on me. So anyways finally they approve it, but of course refused to send the Dr in to talk to me. Which i still think is BS. But whatever, going home sucked. Pain had returned. It was no fun, walking, moving, everything SUCKED. But no nausea what so ever. No gas pain. They said to go home and eat light, i didn't. I was hungry! Still no nausea. YAY. So i didn't really do much that day wanted to just lay in bed, but that idea was BAD. I couldn't really get into bed comfortably then getting up to go to the bathroom a few minutes later was horrible. So i decided lets do our reclining couch. Easier to get up off of. So that worked out better. Peeing every 10 minutes was awesome when it hurt to get up also, i might add! Must have been from the fluids. By Friday i was feeling a bit better. At least could move around more. But sitting up was HORRIBLE. I think i prolonged my recovery by sitting up at the computer on Wednesday (day after surgery) because i thought i was feeling better. I guess that was because of the pain meds. Cause once they wore off (i missed my timed dose). I was in alot of pain. Had to take 2 norcos. Anyways that weekend my belly button incision started to look infected, so i had to go in on Tuesday to have it looked at and yup infected. Lovely. Its still healing but looking better.

So that's the surgery itself info, now lets go into the results portion of this blog. :p

The day i left surgery Dr Kb had wrote down what she found to give to me, cause i knew my husband wouldn't remember anything. It said everything looked normal, did see a spot on the left side that they biopsied for proof of endo. But i was mad because most of my pain is on the right. So i felt as if i did this for nothing and its just going to be even more unanswered questions and i knew this was the last thing we could do to find out what was going on...

But when i saw Dr KB on Tuesday to go over the results and re-look at the incision. She said the biopsy did come back positive for endometriosis. She said most likely there is endo other places but that is the most obvious. Because i asked about the pain being mostly on the other side. (i do have some on the left side though). She said it can radiate up or down. She said it is stage 1 right now. She prescribed some anti inflammatory for when i have the severe pain. She said this is the reason for all the pressure Ive felt lately, shooting pains, etc. So we finally have a reason for everything. Which even thought i don't want to have endometriosis, i am glad that at least i know what is wrong. At least i know I'm not insane, and its not all in my head. Which i was starting to think it was!

So, she went over the next steps for us having children. She said we now have 3 factors of infertility. A triple edged sword if you will. I have the PCOS along with the endo, combined with my husbands low count. So that's just lovely. She said the chances of us concieving naturally are EXTREMELY low. She did say that there were no cysts on my ovaries, so the metformin is removing those. So i should be having normal cycles and i don't. So there really isn't much else she can do for that. So she told me my only chances of getting pregnant are going to be the realm of IUI, maybe IVF later on. She said we need to remove as many factors of the infertility that we can to increase our chances. Which means bypassing the cervix completely. Now i am completely fine with doing IUI, which wont be able to do until into the future due to the finances. Insurance doesn't cover that, and i think its around 2000$ + per try, something like that (not exactly sure, but more than what we have right now). Will need injectables to help me ovulate, all of that is expensive.

So that's it. That's the news i received. It hurt to hear that with enough money we can make this happen, that we cant make this happen on our own. Kinda feels like a dagger in my heart. Because who knows when we will have that kind of money to afford this. & usually it will take multiple tries for it to work. It just really isn't fair the way things work. Really struggling with that. I do know that miracles happen, i know this my cousin and his wife are proof of that. But miracles like that don't happen for everyone. I am going to keep hoping that it will in the future. I wont lose hope. I guess all i can do now, is get working on my classes to start my new career, hope I'm successful and can afford to have the children we want, one day. But in the mean time i am worried of the Endometriosis getting worse. I asked the Dr if it does get worse as time goes by and she says its a very mysterious disease and theres really no way to tell. So I worry we are fighting the clock. I mean we might have to wait another year or longer until we can do the IUI. I just hope the endo doesn't get worse in the mean time. Also work on putting extra money away, and getting my career started. The clock is already ticking for me since i am a little over 2 months from 29. Its not like we have years to wait. :/ But we don't really have a choice.

Alright that's about all for now. I have many many more thoughts, and feelings go on lately, but i cant type anymore. Thanks for listening everyone. Sorry this was all over the place. Mind is jumpy lately, just so much going on. So much going through my head. I have this, and some family drama that just makes this situation even harder because i feel very alone. Crazy Psycho's can have multiple kids(beat them, turn their backs on them) and ruin peoples lives, but i cant HAVE one. Seriously? Ugh OK I'm done, cant even go into that right now! That's a whole nother story that isn't appropriate for here!

With Love,
Krystal

Yup

I have a lot to blog about, but am still just taking it all in right now. Also hurting (physically and emotionally). Incision is infected and ended up back at the drs getting It looked at and her trying to dig it out. Hurt more than I can explain. Hopefully will have a long blog entry tomorrow. We have some answers now, but we didn't talk about it too much due to being a squeeze in for the infection. Ouch! Will know more Tuesday!

Love, Krystal

Post Op mini Post

HI Everyone, 

I know i haven't updated everyone on my surgery yet. I've just been recovering and haven't felt like really putting it all out there yet. But i will. Just wanted to let any readers who read this know that i am OK. Surgery went well. Will write an update maybe tomorrow. :) See you then! 

With love,
Krystal 

Thanks for reading, feel free to comment so i know if anyone even reads these. LOL 

Surgery

Can't believe surgery is in 2 days. I am very scared/nervous about it. I don't know what to expect, I've never been under anesthesia before. I've never had any kind of surgery and what I've read about afterwards isn't fun. I'm worried something might happen. :/ I just don't know what to expect. ;/ I'm worried about recovery time also. But I am anxious to FINALLY know what has been going on all these years! I'm just hoping that when I wake up I'm not told they had to remove something that would prevent any chances of me becoming pregnant. That would break my heart.

Alright I'm off to bed. Thanks for listening/reading.

Love,
Krystal